An Education from the Past

With all due respect and gratitude to the class presidency...I just got home from my 20 year high school reunion. As you may know from my twitter account I'm clearly not one that felt or feels a need to hold onto the past. You would probably quite correctly guess that I was one of those kids that sat back with arms folded in pep rallies and assemblies, desperately wishing the event would end so they could get back to class and get the day over with. Often I sat back in the cafeteria and watched all the popular kids interacting and getting all involved in everything high school. I was invisible. Oh sure I'd interact whenever someone talked to me, but really, when did that ever happen? I never fit in. I had lots of acquaintances...very few friends. And I was alright with that.

Back to the reunion... One person talked with me, one of the "geeks" of the school. I always liked John. Not that I ever talked with him much. We exchanged the pleasantries, the gratuitous, "What're you doing now?" and we went our separate ways.

My wife and I sat at the far table with our backs to the wall, so we could watch everyone. No one talked with us. Of course we never gave them the chance. I felt uncomfortable staring at the yearbook badges we were wearing for fear of unintended insult ("What, I've changed that much!?"), and by doing so I may spark a conversation with someone I never really cared to converse with. Anyway, after a walk down memory lane led by the class president and a speech from a prestigious teacher, we invisibly sneaked out and drove home.

On the way home I shared with my wife something that came as a shock to me. I finally--finally--after 20 years understood what "school spirit" meant.

I told her I had always equated "school spirit" with "class spirit." I was never any good at making or keeping friends, so what did I care about my class? In my mind, the Class of '88 was a bunch of the cool, social kids that cared entirely too much about what was going on for a mere four years of their lives. Me? I just wanted to be left alone to do my school work, go home, and watch some cartoons...maybe play a video game and work on my computer. The occasional date was nice, too (though to be honest, those rarely came, considering I was quite obviously a rather socially backward wall flower). The future would take care of itself, much like the present does, so don't get too caught up in any of it.

We get education from the strangest places, and imagine the irony that I got it from a teacher! ...Keeping in mind this was at my 20-year reunion. Mr. Crump talked a bit about the fact that our high school was going to be celebrating its 100th year of service soon. He invited us all to join its year-long celebration. I considered going! Me! The one who couldn't care less about school spirit! That is when the distinction became very clear. School spirit is about the institution; it's about the faculty, the staff, and perhaps your friends through whose care you pass during those fleeting four years. It's not about how much bonding you do with your classmates...though that can help. It's about the legacy your brief stint creates for future alumni to appreciate and contribute to. It's about appreciating the legacy your predecessors and the current staff added to the virtual blink of an eye you are there.

My wife said, "Yeah, when they built that high school near our house, I was bummed that our kids wouldn't be able to go to our high school."

That's exactly how I felt when I learned a new high school was being built nearer us than our old high school. When I realized I felt that way a few years ago, I questioned it. Why would I feel that way? What do I care about people that I really didn't care about? What do I care about where my kids have pep rallies and social awkwardness? Tonight it came clear. Because there is, was, and always will be a little, tiny (albeit invisible) piece of me in that old high school. There will always be a love for that place, the faculty, and now new-found respect for the class presidency...and maybe even for those "flighty social butterflies" that got it long before I did.

Oh, and when you go to your next reunion, a little note from those who know: talk to those on whom you had a crush--even if you're with your spouse--or you'll regret it. Loose ends always need tying up.