Expect the Unexpected

Until you have established rules of behavior, expecting someone to behave a certain way is foolishness. Indeed, it's its own perfect example of a little tyranny.

There's a reason people train in protocol. It establishes a set of rules of behavior that everyone can agree upon in order to accomplish a particular goal. Once this is done, those who break protocol can quite accurately anticipate a negative reaction from those with whom they've set protocol. If no protocol is set, there is no reason to be annoyed, offended, etc.

The placing of expectations on others is foolish. It is establishing protocol that people don't know about. It is unfair.

When you get offended because someone didn't do as your expectations dictate, take a deep breath and say, "Well, that was unexpected," and then deal with it!

People are going to disappoint you. They are going to do what you don't expect them to do. Inevitably they will do what you think is inappropriate, especially when they're unaware of your individual expectations. (And just so you know, even when they are aware of your individual expectations, can you really expect them to keep track of your very own, pet protocols? Likely, you're not the only individual in their life.)

I've recently heard a saying that, while unfortunate, rings very true. The gist was when people do something, it's not about you, it's about them. It is therefore extremely unlikely that whatever they did was calculated to offend. It's far more likely they did it because they thought it was the right thing to do at the time. So chill out. Stop falling into that same trap and understand one thing: if you expect others to consider you, consider them, even when they don't consider you.

The Golden Rule is not "Be offended when people do unto you as you don't expect others to." It's just a bit more selfless.

Expect others to act unexpectedly. Adapt. Accept. Enjoy. Repeat as necessary.